Anakin smiled faintly. “I remember that I didn’t care much for the lessons.”
“for ANY lessons, as I recall. But it’s a pity, you should have paid more attention. To understand politics is to understand the fundamental nature of thinking beings. Right now, you should remember one of my first teachings: all those who gain power are afraid to lose it.”
“The Jedi use their powers for good,” Anakin said, a little too firmly.
“Good is a point of view, Anakin. And the Jedi concept of good is not the only valid one. Take your dark Lords of the Sith for example. From my reading, I have gathered that the Sith believed in justice and security every bit as much as the Jedi – “
“Jedi believe in justice and peace.”
“In these troubled times, is there a difference? The Jedi have not done a stellar job of bringing peace to the galaxy, you must agree. Who’s to say the Sith might not have done better?”
“The Sith are evil.”
“From a Jedi’s point of view,” Palpatine allowed. “Evil is a label we all put on those who threaten us, isn’t it? Yet the Sith and the Jedi are similar in almost every way, including their quest for greater power.”
“The Jedi quests is for greater understanding,” Anakin countered. “For greater knowledge of the force – “
“Which brings with it greater power, does it not?”
“Well … yes. “ Anakin had to laugh. “I should know better than to argue with a politician.”
“The real difference between a Jedi and the Sith lies only in their orientation; a Jedi gains power through understanding, and a Sith gains understanding though power. That is the true reason the Sith have always been more powerful than the Jedi. The Jedi fear the dark side so much they cut themselves off from the most important aspect of life: passion. Of any kind, they don’t even allow themselves to love.”
“The Sith do not fear the dark side. The Sith have no fear. They embrace the whole spectrum of experience, from the heights of transcendent joy to the depths of hatred and despair. Beings have these emotions for a reason, Anakin. That is why the Sith are more powerful: they are not afraid to feel.”
“The Jedi – the Jedi are good…”
“What the Jedi are,” Palpatine said gently, “is a group of very powerful beings you consider to be your comrades. And you are loyal to your friends; I have known that for as long as I have known you, and I admire you for it, but are your friends loyal to you? Would a true friend ask you to do something that is wrong? The Council have asked you to spy on me, have they not?”
Anakin shot him a sudden frown.
“It is alright. I have nothing to hide.”
“I’m not sure it’s wrong,” Anakin said. Obi-wan might have been telling the truth. It was possible. They might only want to catch Sidious. They might really be trying to protect Palpatine.
“Have they asked you to break the Jedi Code? To violate the constitution? To betray a friendship? To betray your own values? Think, Anakin, I have always tried to teach you to think – yes, yes, Jedi do not think, they know, but those stale answers aren’t good enough in these changing times! Keep your mind clear of assumptions. The fear of losing power is a weakness of both the Jedi and the Sith.”
Anakin sank in his seat. Too much had happened in too short a time. Everthing jumbled together in his head, and none of it seemed to make complete sense.
Except for what Palpatine said.
That made too much sense.
“Anakin – are you familiar with the Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise?”
Anakin shook his head.
“Ah, I thought not. It is not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend, of a dark lord who had turned his sight inward so deeply that he had come to comprehend, and master, life itself. And – because the two are one, when seen clearly enough – death itself.”
Anakin sat up. Was he actually hearing this? “He could keep someone safe from death?”
“The dark side seems to be – from my reading – the pathway to many abilities some would consider unnatural.”
“What happened to him?”
“Well, to safeguard his power’s existence, he teaches that path toward it to his apprentice.”
“And?”
“And his apprentice kills him in his sleep,” Palpatine said with a careless shrug. “Plageuis never sees it coming. That’s the tragic irony, see: he can save anyone in the galaxy from death – except himself.”
“What about the apprentice? What happens to him?”
“Oh, him. He goes on to become the greatest Dark lord the Sith have ever known …”
“What if,” Anakin said slowly, almost not daring to speak the words, “It’s not a legend?”
“Oh, I am … rather certain … that Plagueis did indeed exist …”
“How would I find him?”
“I’m sure I couldn’t say. You could ask your friends on the Jedi council, I suppose – but of course, if they ever found him they’d kill him on the spot. Not as punishment for any crime, you understand. Innocence is irrelevant to the Jedi. They would kill him simply for being Sith, and his knowledge would die with him.”
“I just – I have to – you – you seem to know so much about this, I need you to tell me: would it be possible, possible at all, to learn this power?”
Palpatine shrugged, regarding him with that smile of gentle wisdom.
“Well, clearly,” he said,”not from a Jedi.”
====================================================================
“Tell me what you want.”
Anakin squinted up at him. “I don’t understand.”
“Of course you don’t.” the last of the sunset haloed his ice white hair and threw his face into shadow. “You’ve been trained to never think about that. The Jedi never ask you what you want. They simply tell you what you’re supposed to want. They never gave you a choice at all. That’s why they take their students – their victims– at an age so young that choice is meaningless. By the time a Padawan is old enough to choose, he has been so indoctrinated – so brainwashed – that he is incapable of even considering that question.”
“I am … offering you … anything,” Palpatine said. “Ask, and it is yours. A glass of water? It’s yours. A bag full of Corusca gems? Yours. Look out the window behind me, Anakin. Pick something, and it’s yours,”
“Is this some kind of joke?”
“The time for jokes is past, Anakin. I have never been more serious.” Within the shadow that cloaked Palpatine’s face, Anakin could only just see the twin gleams of the chancellor’s eyes.
“I know what you truly want,” the shadow said. “I have only been waiting for you to admit it to yourself.” A hand - a human hand, warm with compassion – settled onto his shoulder. “Listen to me: I can help you save her.”
“Darth Plagueis was real. Darth Plagueis was my Master. He taught me the key to his power,” the shadow said, dryly matter-of-fact, “before I killed him.”
Without understanding how he had moved, without ever intending to move, without any transition of realization or dawning understanding, Anakin found himself on his feet, a blue bar of sizzling energy terminated a centimeter from Palpatine’s chin, its glow casting red-edged shadows up his face and across the ceiling.
“It’s you. It’s been you all along! I should kill you,” he said. “I will kill you!”
“I am,” he said simply, “your friend.”
The blue bar of energy wavered.
“I am also the man who has always been here for you, I am the man you have never needed to lie to, I am the man who wants nothing from you but that you follow your conscience. If that conscience requires you to commit murder, simply over a … philosophical difference … I will not resist.”
His hands opened, still at his sides. “Anakin, when I told you that you can have anything you want, did you think I was excluding my life?”
“You – you won’t even fight- ?”
“Fight you?” Palpatine look astonished that he would suggest such a thing. “But what would happen when you kill me? What will happen to the republic? His tone was gently reasonable. “What will happen to Padme?”
“Padme …”
Her name was a gasp of anguish.
“When I die,” Palpatine said with the air of a man reminding a child of something he ought to already know, “my knowledge dies with me.”
The sizzling blade trembled.
“Unless, that is, I have the opportunity to teach it … to my apprentice …”
“Anakin,” Palpatine said kindly, “Let’s talk.”
This is how it feels to be Anakin Skywalker, right now:
You don’t remember putting away your lightsaber.
You don’t remember collapsing in the chair where you sit now, nor do you remember drinking water from the half empty glass that you find in your hand.
You remember only that the last man in the galaxy you thought you could trust has been lying to you since the day you met.
And you’re not even angry about it.
You can’t argue. Words are beyond you.
“I – I’ll turn you over to the Jedi council – They’ll know what to do – “
“I’m sure they will. They are already planning to overthrow the republic; you’ll give them exactly the excuse they’re looking for. And when they come to execute me, will that be justice? Will they be bringing peace?”
“They won’t – they wouldn’t - !”
If only Obi-wan were here – Obi-wan would know what to say. What to do.
“Perhaps not. I hope you are correct, Anakin, my boy. Perhaps it’s simply a question of whether you love Obi-wan Kenobi more than you love your wife.”
There are no more searching for words.
“Take your time. Meditate on it. I will still be here when you decide.”
Inside your head, there is only fire. Around your heart, the dragon whispers that all things die.
This is how it feels to be Anakin Skywalker, right now.
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